Father,
There are things in my heart that trouble me, that drag me down, that create burdens in my life. I am a sinful person, and though I strive to be an acceptable Christian in your eyes, my human nature shines through brighter than the veil of your Son’s sacrificial blood. I am ashamed. Not that I am a sinner, but that I allow sin to rule my life. I know, Lord, that sin is inescapable, but I should work to minimize the impact it has on my life. Father God, what I need is to be broken. My heart is already split in twain, but my being still thrives in this sinful nature. Take my life, Father, and make it your tool for this world. I know that tools are purposeful, they are instruments, and when their work is done they are put away, forgotten until the next time it is needed. I pray that my life be a tool for you, my Sovereign. That I may be used for your purpose, and when the job is done, that the work is remembered, and not the instrument that was employed. Like a good tool, I pray that I can be useful until I am broken, and Father, I pray that I am broken, because a broken tool is evident of a life of use, employed in service. What talents I have, dear Father, I give them to you, a sacrifice of my life to be useful to your kingdom.
Dear God, I beg of you to remove the pain that is in my heart. Earthly things are filling my mind, and allowing my heart to drift away from you. I do not want to accept this! I want to be your warrior, and a warrior is faithful, in mind, body, and soul. I depend on you for my strength, for my ability to defeat your enemies. To be successful, though, I must lose myself; I must be dedicated in you. I must give you the gift of my heart, but it is broken with earthly jealousy, greed, anger, pain, sorrow, and depression. Father, mend my heart with the balm of love, kindness, forgiveness, understanding, and hope. Only then will I be able to bring my heart to you, a whole offering that can be used in your wisdom. In my life I have tried to use my heart with my own wisdom, and I have found that my own wisdom is lacking! Master, bless me with your guidance, so that while my hand moves on this earth, that it is your will directing it. Without your knowledge, without your understanding, the action of this humanly shell is vain and worthless. Create in me a sanctuary for your Word, Father. So that in times of stress, decision, unbearable discomfort, and pain, your wisdom will be in me, and my life can be a reflection of what you truly desire.
Lord, I know that the desires of this world can be strong, and I beg of you to instill in me the courage and faith to stand up for what I believe in, even when it will hurt me to do so. You know my being, and you are aware of my weakness, of the softness of my resolve, of the chink in my armor. I pray, dear Lord, that you break my earthly armor down, made of the things of this world, and you rebuild it with heavenly things, so that when the enemy tempts me, I will stand firm. However, I pray that you do not remove temptation from my life, but use what temptation I may encounter as a test, so that I may prove that as a warrior of Christ I am steadfast. When these times of temptation arise, Lord, I ask that you only grant me the blessing of your grace, which I know is sufficient for whatever troubles I may encounter. Father God, like a new vase in the kiln I ask that you try me by fire, so that the cracks in my faith are slowly melted together, and only a strong surface is left, one that is greater than the sum of my parts, one that is held together by you.
As I write, and pray, this prayer, Master, I ask that you raise it up in my heart, and burn it into my soul. Make these words a part of my being, Father, and as I experience new things in my life as a Christian I ask that you amend these words, add to them as I grow, and grant me the understanding to know that this is from you, Father, and not the world. Lord God, I beg of you to seal this prayer within my heart, and that as I walk out into the world, I lift it up as an anthem to you. This is my anthem, and like any anthem, I will bear it proudly for the world to see, and I will shout it to the breadth of my voice so that when the world sees me, they see crystalline glass, and behind me, through me, all around me, your presence is evident. This is my anthem, and I am not ashamed, nor will I become ashamed, of what it means to me. Lord, take this anthem and I beg of you to bless it so that I may be whole.
Your servant,
-Davin J. Miller
